All posts by Franklin Fuller

Even In Darkness

I’ll be the first to admit I’m a sucka.  I let others place their opinions and values in my head, then I go running with it.  My dad and brother were and are in the trucking business (RIP Pops), so I naturally thought it would be my love too.  So, what did I do?  I studied everything trucking, from how to start a trucking LLC, to owning and operating, to onboarding.  But unlike my dad and brother… I don’t care much for trucking.

In 2012 I joined a rather radical organization, the Black Hebrew Israelites, and they hated whites, homosexuals and women.  What did my natural following-self do?  I became a homophobic racist who somehow liked women, but belittled them every chance I got.  That very same year I joined Occupy Chicago and Occupy Dallas and marched with the LGBTQ population to stop, or try to stop, big stock trading companies from taking over the government. 

And when I met Lukmon in a jail cell – it was no different.  His values became my values, and his way with words became mine.  You get the picture.  Since I was a homosexual-hating radical racist, me sitting in the county jail facing two murder charges shouldn’t surprise anyone.  But here’s the thing.  I suffer from a ‘personality disorder’.  If you’ve ever watched the movie Welcome To Me, I’m the black male version of that.  On top of that, when I was in the county jail, along came COVID-19, hell bent on wiping out half the population.  Suddenly no one was allowed to be released, and just as suddenly, it was decided anyone without a seriously violent crime like mine could get a P.R. bond.  Seventeen of us in my tank didn’t meet that qualification.  And it wasn’t long before I started noticing things…

In Dallas County’s North Tower there are tanks of 24 people with four cells that have six beds each.  There were no assigned seats, so people slept where they were comfortable.  Two days into the lockdown, I woke up to find I was the only man in a six man cell!  I gotta admit I’m a bit of a weirdo.  I had a big afro going, I didn’t talk to anyone, ever, and the medication I was on had me shuffling across the floor in circles all the time.  So, no, not one soul wanted to share a room with me.

Then one day I heard, or overheard (ear hustled), a conversation between a youthful older guy and his lawyer about how crazy it was for him to be jailed for breaking into his own home.  I gotta admit that was the dumbest reason I’d ever heard someone be arrested for.  But, it was a violation of his parole, so bail was denied and, like me, he had to just sit.  His name was Lukmon, he was fifty-four years old – and he was staying on a top bunk!  Eventually, he decided it was ridiculous for him to be climbing on a top bunk when I was living in a six-man cell by myself.  At first one of his cellmates said, “Don’t do it!  That fool is craaazzzyyy.  All he do is twist his hair, walk in circles and talk to his self.”  Lukmon heeded the advice at first, but after a couple days he remembered – not one person in this world is just something.  

I was watching Wendy that day, like I always did around lunchtime, when I turned around on a commercial and saw a bald, light-skinned guy curled up in my cell!  Not only was I surprised, but I’d grown comfortable in my own cell.  So in hysterical laughter, Wendy ruined that day, I walked slowly to my cell and went to sleep hoping it would be normal again when I woke up.  

I don’t know how many days Lukmon and I sat in that cell in silence.  But one day I had just gotten off the phone with the mother of my daughter, and it didn’t go so well.  I stood to watch the news and felt eyes on me.  I turned to find Lukmon doing the ‘contemplating man’ walk behind me.  When our eyes met, he asked, “What do they call you?”  That should have been established on day one, I thought, before telling him my Hebrew name, Maleek.  And right there it started.  We took our conversation to the room, where we talked for the first time.

And Lukmon can talk.  He amazed me with his optimism about prison.  Having spent twenty-two years mostly on the Smith Unit as its Islamic Coordinator, he didn’t mind the possibility that he’d be going back.  “Why would I be bothered by going to prison?  Prison is the second largest university, you know why?  Because you got unlimited time to surround yourself with books!  In fact, colleges should envy prison.”

He proved his point by getting on the phone and ordering a bunch of books.  He also told me about his man-cave back home, where he had a plastic tub full of handwritten notes from the books he’d studied.  He prophesied, “That’s gonna be you.  People are gonna think you’re crazy cause all you will do is study and write.  They’ll be intrigued by what I was intrigued by, and that’s that you are an enigma.”

I didn’t know what ‘enigma’ meant, but I used my context clues to figure it out.  That night, we didn’t sleep.  Lukmon was a conversationalist and only talked about what mattered to the listener.  Through him, I saw history in a totally different way.  I stopped hating and blaming white people for everything wrong when he told me, “White people have only been ruling the world for eleven hundred years.  We ruled for four thousand.  They did what they had to do to matter.”  I then wanted to know more.

And Lukmon also inspired me to write, though not long after I started, I got a visit from the county chaplain notifying me that my truck-driving, hard-working, crack addicted father had died.  I didn’t tell Lukmon, but he knew I wasn’t 100%.  But I’m never 100%, I’m weirdo Franklin.  Two months later, I got news my Christian mother had died.  I was numb, and just wanted to be on the next Upper Room Express.  I gave up on writing and turned into a TV junkie.  Wendy, the news and TMZ were my life, until one day an unlikely source gave me inspiration that would make Lukmon’s prophesy of me doing time with a pen in my hand come to pass.  I was walking by the television which seemed to be wobbling in a shipwreck kinda way.  I turned to look and saw a large, black celebrity on TMZ twerking in a thong!  The nerve!  People told me she was a famous singer.

But it hit me!  I didn’t stop writing because I had two deaths in my immediate family.  It was my excuse.  I really stopped writing because I felt like Lukmon wanted to rate my writing.  My insecurity used death as an excuse.  But looking at that TV, I knew if this big ol’ chick could find the courage to expose her tale-NT to the world, then my talent should be easy!  So I kept on writing.  

But one night, not long after, I got cold feet and packed up my belongings and snuck out of the tank to keep Lukmon from reading my work.  I regret that.  Why?  Because I guess somewhere inside of me I still want Lukmon’s approval on that first piece I wrote.  I blew my shot, and Lizzo is still killin’ it!

I’ve written over thirty unpublished books since then.  I’m glad to say I’m no longer a homophobic, racist, Hebrew Israelite who hurt people and low-key hated women.  I’m also proud to say I chose to follow someone that I may never see again, but I’ll remember forever, the one person who wanted to prove that a crazy person isn’t just a crazy person.  Well… prove that and also prove he wasn’t scared to sleep in a room with one.  Lukmon once said, “A man that can’t make up his bed can’t make up his mind.”  I promise you that my bed is made right now.  I’m ready to publish.     

ABOUT THE WRITER: Franklin Fuller is new to WITS, and he is also the second place winner in our most recent writing contest. I’m grateful I do not have the task of judging writing contests, but this one was particularly challenging for the judges, as there were so many amazing entries, which makes this accomplishment all the more meaningful. More than one judge commented on Franklin’s honesty and willingness to be vulnerable in his writing. I don’t know much else about him, but I agree with their assessment. If you would like to contact the writer, he can be reached at:

Franklin Fuller #2431449
Bill Clements
P.O. Box 660400
Dallas, TX 75266-0400

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