You sensed the element of grief and sought to know the pain beneath,
The angst behind these gritted teeth… you listened…
You recognized the shattered peace, that mirth was suddenly deceased,
My soul, desperate for relief… you listened…
I was going to throw it all away, but you helped me to see the need to stay.
You showed up in the nick of time, before I nearly lost my mind.
You paid attention to the signs… you listened.
A staff member once saw an ominous storm brewing within me and lent an ear in order to prevent a self-inflicted catastrophe. At the time, my family was stricken with a plague of division and confusion. My father and I were at odds with each other without any real cause. Through years of distance, my wife and I had grown emotionally out of touch with each other. Our daughters grew weary of me calling home. Concerns had developed over my brother’s Alzheimer’s, and funeral arrangements were being put in place in the event he would succumb. To make matters worse, I would not be permitted to view his body due to the wishes of our father. It shocked me to the core when I discovered I would once again be denied the privilege to honor a deceased family member. My mother had died almost a decade earlier – from Alzheimer’s.
It was when I was nearing the end of my rope and about to give up that someone intervened. I had suddenly turned grim and silent, extraordinarily indifferent to life, no longer my jovial self. When shown genuine concern for my well-being, I felt compelled to open up and share my grief. I was provided attentive listening and assured what I shared would be confidential. One person reminded me of the value of life regardless of how troubling circumstances can end up. Doing so resulted in me no longer posing a threat to myself.
I was grateful for the consideration of my grief, the act having such a great impact on me that I eventually decided to work on getting my life in order. The experience taught me the importance of remaining vigilant to signs of depression in others, and being willing to express genuine concern for another’s well-being. I know first-hand, the very act may be the determining factor in the prevention of self-harm.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR. Robert Vallejo recently submitted this piece to a WITS writing contest. While the work did not place in the contest, one of the judges ranked it in first place. A person’s perspective, life experiences and preferences often determine the outcome of the reading, and WITS writing contests are judged by multiple people. I hope this encourages all submissions, as this happens often.
To contact Robert Vallejo:
Robert Vallejo #0923382
Columbus Correctional Institution
1255 Prison Camp Road
Whiteville, NC 28472
