Tell me, Sis,
How we supposed to get past this?
I’ll never be content
Talkin’ about in the past tense.
And I gotta ask this…
Was it my fault?
Should I have kept it all in and masked it?
I mean… I called you Angel, but it was only metaphorically!
I didn’t mean for you to go and get a halo and wings!
Ups! Down! But we never meant to say those things!
I was only mad… and ignorant… I didn’t know how to act!
I didn’t know how to be – a brother.
I was too busy tryna be a ‘G’,
Something I wasn’t!
But see, I don’t wanna go get this tattoo saying R.I.P.!
And I know how you felt about Ma and Kareem,
But did you miss ‘em that much?
That you had to leave so early,
Just to feel they touch?
Damn, Sis!  What about us?  (what about us?)
What about Rob? What about T.J.?
He didn’t even get enough… of you.
Was it all just too much… for you?
Backbone to a family?
Mother and father to a son,
Yet, you weren’t manly!
And what about, Mama?
She raised her own four,
And here’s another two.
Okay, more like three, we all know how Rob can be!
And I don’t mean to sound selfish,
But fuck that!  What about ME?
Do I accept this?  Take it in stride?
Or do I come with you?
To spend a little bit of time,
Standing in line?
‘Cause you know everyone makes it to the gates,
But not everyone makes it inside.
So, when you make it in…
Vouch for me,
Let God know I’m not that bad!
Or at least ask for a weekend pass!
So when I’m in Hell, it won’t feel like it
The way I make the memories from those three days last!
I just wanna come kick it with you and Beamer.
I know she there!
All dogs go to Heaven,
They’re innocent creatures.
Now, back to the subject,
How do you want me to deal with this pain?
Guess I’m happy to have it,
‘Cause if I would’ve went before you,
Lord only knows what that would’ve done to your brain.
Brain?  Well, there’s some screws loose,
But I would give you mine in a heartbeat.
Now I wish I could just give you a heartbeat!
My heartbeat!
I’m feeling kinda dead inside,
There’s a lot of lead inside.
I would sink if I went swimmin’.
I’d rather go feet first into the flames,
Then to have this feeling!
And what’s the correct way to mourn an Angel?
I don’t know!
But why the fuck did you have to be the one to teach me!
You were the only one who could reach me,
The only one to feed me…
All that love that God blessed you with!
I’m sorry for all the shit I ever stressed you with.
Remember, you told me about Kareem?
And I was asking, ‘Who goin’ to be next and ‘ish?
I knew it wouldn’t be you!
You  didn’t even make the list.
I coulda never guessed this ‘ish!
Yeah! Yeah! I hear you now, tellin’ me not to stress the ‘ish,
But that’s easier to say.
My puzzle been missing pieces,

and another one just went away…

ABOUT THE WRITER. Jarod Wesenberg has shared his poetry here before. He wrote this piece for someone special who he was not able to say goodbye to. Jarod doesn’t write for us often, but when he does, it is a pleasure to share his writing.

Jarod can be contacted at:

Jarod L. Wesenberg, Sr. #1830643
Michael Unit
2664 FM 2054
Tennessee Colony, TX 75886