The mind amazes me – how it can be the only power we have over attitude; how, though we can’t change our circumstances, our attitude can change the way we experience events.  It brings to mind the way we experience a roller coaster ride – choosing between an attitude of faith or doubt.  If I doubt the safety of the harness, question if it will hold, it will be a terrifying ride, hands clenched to the lap bar, feet dug into the floor, eyes closed and likely feeling miserable.

But if I choose to live in faith that the safety harness is strong enough to hold me, then I can focus on enjoying the ride.  I can open my eyes, lean into every turn, throw my hands in the air and surrender to the thrill of it.  Nothing on the ride has changed, the trajectory of the ride was already determined, every curve, every loop, the length.  But inwardly, my experience was drastically different – faith felt like heaven, doubt felt like hell.

It’s pretty obvious the metaphor for spiritually and life itself; and, admittedly, the rollercoaster is a little cliche.  Still… I am convinced that God has laid out a track for each of our lives, and while we can make certain choices – keep our hands on the bar or throw them skyward – much of our lives are beyond our control.  Who knows?  Only thing I do know is that God commands us to love our fellow man, which, if applied as a life principle, leads to a way of life – a track.  So, once I committed to this way, it locked in the basic trajectory of my life, the circumstances I would find myself in, the people I’d encounter along the way, the trials and storms and temptations I’d face.

So, now all I can change is my attitude toward those events.  When I doubt God, I find myself afraid to love others, afraid that my kindness will be mistaken for weakness, afraid I’ll be rejected or disappointed, afraid I’ll be taken advantage of.  Prison is hard enough, and I sometimes fear that trying to love my fellow prisoners will turn me into prey.

Yet, when I’ve chosen to trust in God, I’ve felt an explosion of joy in my soul when I surrender to the love, let it shine forth.  God says, “When the Lord takes pleasure in anyone’s way, He causes even their enemies to make peace with them.”  (Proverbs 16:7)  God takes pleasure in our ways when we love one another, forgive, show mercy, etc.  And He keeps His people safe.  Granted, there are times God asks us to sacrifice and suffer for a higher purpose, but generally, a lot of our suffering is avoidable – if we’ll just trust and obey.  

So, often, my fears are unfounded because God is the X-factor.  Sure, without God, people may treat me a certain way, or when I do things for my own purposes people may prey on any vulnerable area, but when I am sincerely trying to do God’s will, the normal laws of human nature don’t apply.  Rather, God is involved because God is love, and so unexpected things occur – a cruel person suddenly is kindly toward me, the bully finds someone else to pick on, the thief decides not to steal from my cell.  

Like I said, it amazes me how powerful our attitudes can be.  Though the outward reality of being in prison has not changed for me, my attitude of faith has changed the way I experience prison life – I’m not afraid.  Rather, I’m filled with joy.  I have thrown my hands in the air, surrendered to the will of God, and now I just enjoy the ride.